The Influence competence requires that we be seen as…

The Influence competence requires that we be seen as trustworthy; competence in managing conflicts goes best with a talent for helping all parties recognize their shared values and human needs.

— from Communication & Conflict (Communication/Conflict) · *Optimal: How to Sustain Personal and Organization aExcellence Every Day by Daniel Goleman *

In the book

The master key is to dig beneath the surface fight to the thing you share. Under almost every practical disagreement lies a deeper value you both actually hold; name it, return to it, and refuse to doubt the other person's good intentions — that shared truth underneath is the ground you negotiate from. The best conflict-resolvers do exactly this: they help all parties recognize their common values and human needs, which is why they must first be seen as trustworthy. When you are stuck, try the literal version of empathy: step into the other person's shoes. — Communication & Conflict (Communication/Conflict)

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