We subjectively feel calmer when we know what emotions…

We subjectively feel calmer when we know what emotions we are having. Ideally, we learn to name our emotions as children. But sometimes, for any number of reasons, we don't learn to recognize emotions. There is scientific evidence that putting language on an emotion actually changes the brain, decreasing its arousal

— from The Heart in the Cockpit (Emotion/Awe/Anxiety/Regret/Empathy) · It's Not Always Depression: Working the Change Triangle to Listen to the Body, Discover Co

In the book

Psychologists call this reappraisal, and it works like a fresh coat of paint transforming a familiar room. The first tool of reappraisal is to name the feeling. Putting a word on an emotion — this is anger, this is fear — quiets the brain and lowers its arousal; watch your feelings as they rise and name them in the moment, and you slip a sliver of space between the feeling and whatever you might do about it. The richer your vocabulary of feeling — the more finely you can tell apart frustration from disappointment from grief — the better you can manage yourself. […] The discipline first: you cannot stop the feelings from arriving, so the whole craft is in widening the gap between feeling and action, and in learning to read each instrument honestly. Name it, then widen the gap. The instant a strong feeling hits, put a word on it — this is anger, this is fear — because naming it quiets the brain. Then use the mighty pause: do not be swept off your feet by the vividness of the impression; tell it, wait for me a little; let me see what you are. — The Heart in the Cockpit (Emotion/Awe/Anxiety/Regret/Empathy)

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