Many arguments are like fighting with the air they…

Page 142. Many arguments are like fighting with the air they have no practical issue of a sensational kind. He is right, many of our arguments can be traced to conflicting stereotypes rather than any practical difference of opinion. Should we drill down into the experience of living? Without recourse to common experience, It is only a matter of time until two people talk past each other and in dramatic cases which incommensurable positions.

— from Communication & Conflict (Communication/Conflict) · Sick Souls, Healthy Minds- How William James Can Save Your Life by John Kaag

In the book

"I am right" quietly means "you are wrong," and from there the whole thing slides into a contest, a power struggle in which winning matters more than truth. And often you are not even fighting about anything real: a great many arguments are just fighting with the air, clashes of stereotype and assumption rather than any genuine difference of substance. We make it worse with our instinct to avoid: we so dread confrontation that we cannot say no, and the very stress of refusing makes us blurt out yes. — Communication & Conflict (Communication/Conflict)

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