, Page 36
, Page 36. Attention – listening to this caliber, ignites the human mind. The quality of your attention determines the quality of other peoples thinking.
— from Communication & Conflict (Communication/Conflict) · Time to Think, Listening to Ignite the Human Mind by Nancy Kline
In the book
The kind worth learning is what one writer calls generous listening — listening powered by genuine curiosity, a willingness to be surprised, to set down your assumptions and sit with ambiguity, wanting above all to understand the humanity behind the other person's words. It turns out the quality of your attention literally sets the quality of the other person's thinking — people think better in the presence of someone truly listening — so keep your eyes on their eyes and do not look away. To hear, you must first be silent, and you must honor the pauses, because some of the most important things pass between the words rather than in them. […] So here is how to fly the radio between cockpits, and the turbulence between them. Listen first, and generously. Listen with real curiosity and the willingness to be surprised; be silent enough to actually hear; and remember your attention sets the quality of their thinking. Weigh your words before you spend them. Ask what benefit they will bring; speak gently and greet people warmly; mind how you say it, not only what; and beat the curse of knowledge by meeting your listener where they are. — Communication & Conflict (Communication/Conflict)
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